The Boy Behind the Man

When we see a successful person they almost seem larger than life.  We forget that they had parents, a childhood, and a story of how and why they became a success.  When we look a bit closer into their lives we find that these successful people have faced challenging circumstances, and have somehow come out of the ashes doing incredible things.  These stories excite me as they offer hope, and appreciation for those that were courageous enough to believe in something beyond themselves.  

I remember talking to a family member about my Grandfather, who seemed reluctant in sharing some of his childhood experiences. I guess when we share a negative experience with others we are afraid of what people may think, but then I say, ok....but what did they do to overcome it?  I think that sometimes we loose site of the real story.  I mean, you have to tell the whole story to appreciate the outcome....right?

John Wesley & Hattie May, Photo by: CJ Scott

On August 30, 1910 John Wesley was born to Samuel Barker and Martha Caroline Stapley in Belleville, Ontario.  John was the youngest with his only sibling Hattie May who was born on November 15, 1908.  Samuel and "Carrie" had been married since 1906, but 4 years later and just 2 months after John was born, Samuel took ill and died from heart failure with an initial diagnosis of Typhoid Fever at the age of 28.

Samuel Barker, Medical Certificate of Death 1910

With Carrie now a widow at the age of 25, and 2 young children times would be difficult.  In a 1911 Ontario Census for Belleville the household of Daniel Stapley shows his wife Harriett with 3 sons, 2 daughters and 2 grandchildren.  Daughter Martha C., and grandchildren identified as Hattie and John.  In the 1921 Ontario Census we now see Daniel and Charlotte Stapley on their own.  Did Carrie leave her parents household to remarry?  The most logical records to look for now would be a marriage certificate.  Further research shows that Carrie Stapley Barker married Joseph Pratt on December 2, 1914 in Belleville, Ontario with Daniel Stapley and Harriett Sturch showing as her parents as well as Elsie Stapley as a witness to this event which would be Carrie's sister.

Pratt-Stapley Marriage

Based on the life story of John Wesley written in his own words, entitled From An Orphan in the Household of Satan, To An Adopted Son in the Household of God (published in 2008 by family after his death in 1998), he outlines the relationship and expectations from his step parent Joseph.  

At the age of 6 he was responsible for cutting wood with a buck saw, which was so big he had to climb it in order to cut.  From there he had to carry the wood into the house, as well as ensuring the kitchen stove was supplied.  Yard clean up and taking care of all garbage was also expected.  At the age of 10 John remembers being handed a shovel and a pick axe by "Joe" to start digging out a basement to a new addition that Joe was putting on their house.  At this time, Canada was at war and his mother had to start working at a soup factory during the day.  Their Aunt Elsie watched them which provided some reprieve from Joseph's treatment. 

I have not found any records to confirm if Joseph served in any capacity during WW1, and John does reference stories of Joseph working night shifts, however I need to exhaust my research on this and continue to look at alternate spellings of Joseph's name.  Records may bring some light to why Joseph treated the children and John's mother poorly.  Further memories are noted in John's book where he constantly witnessed Joseph's abusive temper in which his mother was subjected to, and how his mother was afraid of him.

Almost 8 years later in May 1922 John Wesley's mother delivered a still born child in Belleville Hospital, and suffered a pulmonary embolism which lead to her death.  John now almost 13 years old, and orphaned knew that he and his sister were not wanted by with his step-father.  Thankfully his grandparents, Daniel and Charlotte, took them in and once again they felt loved and safe.  It was at that time that he decided that he would finish schooling after grade 7. 

Death Certificate of Carrie Pratt 1922, Provided by CJ Scott

Looking again at the 1921 Ontario Census, Daniel and Charlotte are shown living at 38 Johnson Street, which was further verified looking at the Vernon's Directory of Belleville, Ontario dated 1924.  Over the next few years while living with his grandparents he found himself doing the usual teenage activities such as smoking, and drinking.  Stealing coal was another past time which John was not proud of, however coal was needed to heat their house.  As this phase in his life passed he finally acquired his first paying job at 16 years of age working nights in a bread and donut bakery for $7.50 per week.  

With some further research of local maps and Vernon City directories I am hoping to locate the bakery where he worked.  At present I have located a digital archive called the Community Archives of Belleville and Hastings County, which offers directories and maps where I have located several bakeries as well as flour mills that I need to investigate further.  

Charlotte Stapley, Photo by CJ Scott

John continues to work at the bake shop and shares the fact that he was now able to buy his first suit.  He notes in his memoirs that the only other suit he had ever worn was made by his mother when he was but a small boy.  He shares further that he had a close and loving relationship with his Grandmother, and decided to buy a dress for her.  After a month of saving, he was able to pay off the dress which he had set aside for her which she loved.  In February of 1928, only 1 month later, Charlotte became ill and was rushed to the hospital never to return home.  The next time John saw her, she was laid to rest in the new dress that he had purchased for her. 

It would be only 1 year later that John would then come home after a night of working to find his Grandfather Daniel on the kitchen floor dead at the age of 64 due to a seizure.  

 

Now at the age of 19 John is alone again.  He notes that his sister Hattie had been living with an Aunt, and the family had offered to have him live with them at least for awhile.  It was at this time that John was able to find work on the railroad installing block signals due to his uncle's connections.

Based on a map dated 1932 on the Community Archives of Belleville and Hastings, John's previous address of 38 Johnson Street was directly in front of the Canadian National Railway path.  

While working, John became fast friends with a co-worker and was embraced by his friends entire family.  The youngest brother Stu asked John to go on a blind date with him.  According to John's memoirs, once he and Stu got to the location of the date they agreed to switch their dates.  Several dates later with this same girl, he proposed.  Two weeks after his proposal he lost his job working on the railroads, but both John and Lillian Breen decided to go ahead and marry July 27, 1930.  

Lillian continued to work at her hotel job, and John decided to make donuts selling them door to door.  They started from small beginnings and a year later their first child was on its way.  Work would be difficult to find for John, but he was able to get a job killing chickens in a poultry plant.  A few more moves, and some challenging moments in the relationship led them both to a path of church.  Lillian was raised an Irish Roman Catholic and John was raised Methodist, however it was never an issue.

They both came upon a man that had invited them to church, but not a church that either one of them had experienced.  Several weeks later and alot of soul searching, John and Lillian found themselves attending evangelistic meetings where the gospel was taught;  At that time it was called the Latter Rain movement. Fifteen years went by where John worked for a local church as a Sunday School teacher, led street meetings, worship services and preached.  

Once again John found himself working on the railways as a CNR Brakemen, but as his work schedule conflicted with working at church, he approached the chicken plant he had previously worked at, and was hired in a full-time position.  I have revisited the City Maps of Belleville around the 1930's, and have not located this plant, but further research will be required since this is a job that John references several times in his book.  

His focus was now building a house.  With full-time employment, and making donuts during the evening hours to sell at farmer's markets, everything was coming together.  Its 1947 and John is still in Belleville with a newly built house and now 3 children; life was busy.  Where were all of these decisions leading to? 

In 1949, John was offered a position of Pastor in a small country church located in Becher, Ontario.  He was committed to being a Pastor, as John tells in his story that even after he moved to this new role, the chicken plant came back to him offering more work.  With John refusing the offer, his new congregation now knew how committed he was.  As they grew, a larger location was required and they found an old Free Methodist Church which could be relocated from the 10th Concession to the corner of Concession 8 Sombra and County Rd. 31.  People saw his commitment and people came together with enough money to pay for the church building and to have it relocated. 

John Wesley Barker and his family went on to serve congregations in Wallaceburg, Windsor, and Pickering with his final roots planted in Sarnia, Ontario in 1956.  John and Lillian  retired in the early 80's with a legacy of 35 years of service in the ministry.

We never know what life has in store for us regardless of our situation.  John Wesley Barker is an example of how courageous a person can be even when life continued to challenge him.  He believed in something beyond himself, and that belief gave him a life of purpose, love and a legacy for his family.

Okay family historians think about a family story that you would like to know more about, but are uncertain if anyone will talk about it.  Be brave!  You may just find the right moment, and the right words and walk away with a really great story.